Saturday, June 15, 2013
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
I've Been Thinking
I know that's kinda scary. But isn't crazy to think about how people come into your life? And the ones you think will be important aren't and the ones that are you don't realize it until late.
(Heads up, this might end up being me talking in circles and making absolutely no sense.)
Take H for example. Her name alone made me think we weren't going to get along right off the bat. I emailed her timidly because that's what you do when given a roommate's email address right? I didn't know at the time how important she would become in my life or how much we would need each other. And neither of us really understood how tidy we were (We both said somewhat. I'm definitely more than somewhat and she is most definitely less. But I love her!) And now, a year later, I miss her more than dieters miss candy and we text each other funny things that we used to be able to say across the room and now there's an ocean dividing us.
Or A. A admitted to me later on that she hated my first impression and thought I was really stuck up when she first met me (I think I need to work on that... haha). We always joked about our first times hanging out. One day she tried to find me and there was another Britt on the floor but she was Brittany and I'm Brittani. We had our names on the doors courtesy of our RA and Amber knocked on Brittany's door and asked, "Oh, is Brittani here?" and she said "I am Brittany..." How awkward for her right? That led to me sleeping on her extra bed almost every night until K moved in and even then I moved my mattress in. Lucky I have her while K is going to be in London and nearly all of our other friends are going on missions.
And then there's Lady K! K and I met the summer after my junior year. We got in trouble for being rebels without a cause at EFY and keeping the whole building up. We yolo'd so hard even then. Fast forward two years and we find out we're living on the same floor of the same building or Freshman Year at BYU... COINCIDENTALLY. The universe was definitely trying to tell us something then (HIMYM reference, anyone? Anyone? K will get it.)
Where there's Lady K, there's a Lake - the second half of the blondtourage. L and I had our ups and downs but we make a good team. She reminds me not to take life so seriously and she needs me to take her phone so she actually gets her assignments done. And she started as that girl down the hall who wanted us to come see her on Halloween at Sonic because she had to work. Oh, she likes Little Mermaid too so that's kinda bonding.
Can't forget about A and O. Met because BYU put us together in a Y-group because we signed up for the same class our first semester. Take a picture together the first night and it's like you're destined to love them forever. A is on a mission and I talk to him weekly and can't imagine not having his friendship in my life. He truly was an answer to my tear-filled, lonely prayers. And O - we may not have seen each other everyday of the school year, but we finished where we started and made sure there were lots of laughs and memories along the way and are able to pick up where we left off when we are together.
Or my bulldogs. Did you know that when I first moved to Lake County they all picked on me relentlessly? Not like they do now where it's a joking thing. But to the point where I would go home and cry. (I was prettyweird individualistic in the middle school in their defense.) And then in high school I started checking their collars to make sure their ties were covered because I think I might have OCD. And one day Kyle called me Momma Goose and that's how that started. And now I love and care about them like my brothers and I pray for them and worry for them and get excited for them and they are some of the greatest friends in my life. Even if they agitate me without end.
There's the friends I thought would be my friends forever in high school and now we hardly talk or I see their Facebook statuses and that's how I keep updated.
There's the friends who come into your life and leave and come back until you realize how much you love them and need them around. And no matter what life brings you through or where you are or how many times you fight or say "I hate you" deep down you always still care.
There's the friends that I feel obligated to make things work with and I try really hard but I know that in the end I have to do what's best for me and sometimes that means going separate ways because we have different life experiences and we grow in different ways and sometimes that means that we grow apart. But that's life.
What I'm trying to say I guess is that there are so many things that happen in our lives and we don't always take time to appreciate them or write them down or ponder them. And I always tell myself I'll get around to it at some point but tonight I just knew I needed to write it down for me because it's been something I've been thinking about for a while. In the end, I just feel grateful. And that's possibly the best thing.
(Heads up, this might end up being me talking in circles and making absolutely no sense.)
Take H for example. Her name alone made me think we weren't going to get along right off the bat. I emailed her timidly because that's what you do when given a roommate's email address right? I didn't know at the time how important she would become in my life or how much we would need each other. And neither of us really understood how tidy we were (We both said somewhat. I'm definitely more than somewhat and she is most definitely less. But I love her!) And now, a year later, I miss her more than dieters miss candy and we text each other funny things that we used to be able to say across the room and now there's an ocean dividing us.
Or A. A admitted to me later on that she hated my first impression and thought I was really stuck up when she first met me (I think I need to work on that... haha). We always joked about our first times hanging out. One day she tried to find me and there was another Britt on the floor but she was Brittany and I'm Brittani. We had our names on the doors courtesy of our RA and Amber knocked on Brittany's door and asked, "Oh, is Brittani here?" and she said "I am Brittany..." How awkward for her right? That led to me sleeping on her extra bed almost every night until K moved in and even then I moved my mattress in. Lucky I have her while K is going to be in London and nearly all of our other friends are going on missions.
And then there's Lady K! K and I met the summer after my junior year. We got in trouble for being rebels without a cause at EFY and keeping the whole building up. We yolo'd so hard even then. Fast forward two years and we find out we're living on the same floor of the same building or Freshman Year at BYU... COINCIDENTALLY. The universe was definitely trying to tell us something then (HIMYM reference, anyone? Anyone? K will get it.)
Where there's Lady K, there's a Lake - the second half of the blondtourage. L and I had our ups and downs but we make a good team. She reminds me not to take life so seriously and she needs me to take her phone so she actually gets her assignments done. And she started as that girl down the hall who wanted us to come see her on Halloween at Sonic because she had to work. Oh, she likes Little Mermaid too so that's kinda bonding.
Can't forget about A and O. Met because BYU put us together in a Y-group because we signed up for the same class our first semester. Take a picture together the first night and it's like you're destined to love them forever. A is on a mission and I talk to him weekly and can't imagine not having his friendship in my life. He truly was an answer to my tear-filled, lonely prayers. And O - we may not have seen each other everyday of the school year, but we finished where we started and made sure there were lots of laughs and memories along the way and are able to pick up where we left off when we are together.
Or my bulldogs. Did you know that when I first moved to Lake County they all picked on me relentlessly? Not like they do now where it's a joking thing. But to the point where I would go home and cry. (I was pretty
There's the friends I thought would be my friends forever in high school and now we hardly talk or I see their Facebook statuses and that's how I keep updated.
There's the friends who come into your life and leave and come back until you realize how much you love them and need them around. And no matter what life brings you through or where you are or how many times you fight or say "I hate you" deep down you always still care.
There's the friends that I feel obligated to make things work with and I try really hard but I know that in the end I have to do what's best for me and sometimes that means going separate ways because we have different life experiences and we grow in different ways and sometimes that means that we grow apart. But that's life.
What I'm trying to say I guess is that there are so many things that happen in our lives and we don't always take time to appreciate them or write them down or ponder them. And I always tell myself I'll get around to it at some point but tonight I just knew I needed to write it down for me because it's been something I've been thinking about for a while. In the end, I just feel grateful. And that's possibly the best thing.
Thursday, May 30, 2013
I Need You
I need you, if you're reading this, to take a moment and read about these girls.
Climber is a character! she had 3 siblings at camp and I didn't know that until after camp was over. She just does her own thing and does it with a smile. She has a very cool eye too. Maybe you can see it in the picture but she doesn't like to talk about it. She was our time girl at camp because she was the only one, including counselors, that had a watch. Anytime we needed to know the time we would call for her and she'd give it to us. She also loved the flarp we made. It was this goo stuff that you have in a cup. When you push it into the cup it makes a fart noise. Haha the kids loved it but especially her! She was Always playing with it. Her mom has breast cancer and has been fighting it since 2004 so pretty much her whole life since shes only 11. Shes a fun, strong, funny and outgoing girl. She's kinda a tom boy too but I love that about her.
Rio is the sweetest most obedient girl. She always followed directions and was so pleasant to be around. She is very mature for her age and I think that comes from the fact that she has a younger brother with downs syndrome to help take care of and I know she does. She is so helpful and when her parents came to get her I could tell that they are so proud of her and I can see why. Both of her parents had cancer at one point. They are both ok now but they are still watching her dad close. She came to camp last year for her first time and without any of her siblings. She's super brave and intelligent. She's quiet most of the time but when you talk to her she has only good things to say and I just couldn't get enough of her at camp.
I've been asked to sponsor these two girls to attend Camp Kesem BYU this year the week of August 12th. The cost for two campers is approximately $800.
You may be thinking, why should I donate or why should I help Brittani? I promise you this camp will change their lives. Don't believe me? Watch this.
I'm asking you not just to help me out, but to help them. They need this way more than I do!
If you can't help with a donation, any possible help is appreciated (fundraising ideas, etc.)
Kesem (n.): magic; the ability to change a life; an agent of growth;
the unique power that transforms kids into Camp Kesem Campers.
Climber is a character! she had 3 siblings at camp and I didn't know that until after camp was over. She just does her own thing and does it with a smile. She has a very cool eye too. Maybe you can see it in the picture but she doesn't like to talk about it. She was our time girl at camp because she was the only one, including counselors, that had a watch. Anytime we needed to know the time we would call for her and she'd give it to us. She also loved the flarp we made. It was this goo stuff that you have in a cup. When you push it into the cup it makes a fart noise. Haha the kids loved it but especially her! She was Always playing with it. Her mom has breast cancer and has been fighting it since 2004 so pretty much her whole life since shes only 11. Shes a fun, strong, funny and outgoing girl. She's kinda a tom boy too but I love that about her.
Rio is the sweetest most obedient girl. She always followed directions and was so pleasant to be around. She is very mature for her age and I think that comes from the fact that she has a younger brother with downs syndrome to help take care of and I know she does. She is so helpful and when her parents came to get her I could tell that they are so proud of her and I can see why. Both of her parents had cancer at one point. They are both ok now but they are still watching her dad close. She came to camp last year for her first time and without any of her siblings. She's super brave and intelligent. She's quiet most of the time but when you talk to her she has only good things to say and I just couldn't get enough of her at camp.
I've been asked to sponsor these two girls to attend Camp Kesem BYU this year the week of August 12th. The cost for two campers is approximately $800.
You may be thinking, why should I donate or why should I help Brittani? I promise you this camp will change their lives. Don't believe me? Watch this.
I'm asking you not just to help me out, but to help them. They need this way more than I do!
If you can't help with a donation, any possible help is appreciated (fundraising ideas, etc.)
Kesem (n.): magic; the ability to change a life; an agent of growth;
the unique power that transforms kids into Camp Kesem Campers.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
FRICK
The problem with passwords is that I have to many of them! And then I can't remember which one is for which freaking log-in. So then I end up locking myself out in important moments. Like when I want to comment on H's blog post because I miss her more than a poor college freshman guy misses his meals in the Cannon when he's trying to save money/ran out. Words can't express my love for this gal. And she's pretty freaking funny too. So here's my responses.
Tough life, H. STOP I'M SO JEALOUS AND I MISS YOU. COMEBACKTOMEEEE.
LET’SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS TALK ABOUT THE SNAPCHAT.
^that's what I was going to say. Sorry Lake, she's my roommate so I have dibs.
Have I taught you nothing? ALWAYS give your number to the creepy guy. Especially on your birthday when I told you to party like I would. Jeez. SMH.
Okay that's it.
Monday, May 20, 2013
Change
A story is told of a caterpillar named Yellow who was trying to find out what she should be doing
with her life. In her wanderings she discovered another caterpillar seemingly caught in some
gauzy, hairy filament. Concerned, she asked if she could help. He explained that this was all part
of the process of becoming a butterfly.
When she heard the word butterfly, her whole insides leapt. “But what is a butterfly?”
The cocooned caterpillar explained: “It’s what you are meant to become.”
Yellow was intrigued but a bit defiant. “How can I believe there’s a butterfly inside you or me
when all I see is a fuzzy worm?”
On further reflection she pensively asked, “How does one become a butterfly?”
And the answer? “You must want to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar.”
(From Trina Paulus, Hope for the Flowers [New York: Paulist Press, 1972], pp. 6775.)
I guess this RA studying stuff is good for something.
For the whole talk about change by Wendy Watson, click here.
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Monday, May 6, 2013
There's this blog H, A, and I love...
Called "Just Say Amen Already". And it's super hilarious because as a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, she is able to see all the weird or off-beat things about being a Mormon. And sometimes it's just nice to be able to recognize that yes, we are different and yes, that's okay. And if you can't accept it, it's going to make those who mock you winners because you'll begin to give in and believe what they say and feel that you're wrong and they're right.
Well I wasn't expecting to go that way but it did. Anywhoooooo
This blogger wrote this post recently and while she addressed it to converts to the Church I feel that it most definitely applies to all of us on our journey of spiritual progression. She says:
This summer will mark 5 years since I first set foot in an LDS church and met with the missionaries (that’s a different story for a different time).
I’ve done a few posts about what it’s like to be a convert, so I apologize if I’m getting repetitive. But I never expected to have the platform I have now, so I want to use it for good. There’s so much I wish I had known back when I started investigating and then after I converted, and so much I needed to hear. I hope that by saying some of that here now, I can spare someone a little of the suckyness that comes from converting. And I don’t think it applies just to converts. So, here are some of the things I wish I had known as an investigator/new convert/member-whose- bishop-said-she-is-no-longer-a-“new-covert”-but-she-is-still-trying-to-find-her-way-and-kind-of-resents-Bishop-for-saying-that
1. You didn’t make a mistake.
2. Mormons have their own language (RM= returned missionary, RS= Relief Society, EQ= Elder’s Quorum, YM/YW=Young Men/Young Women’s, the U= University of Utah, the Y= BYU (or a hiking trail in Provo that I’m told is lovely), ZL= Zone Leader, FGSJSTWPBYDMI= For Goodness Sake, Just Say The Whole Phrase Because You’re Driving Me Insane (I made that last one up) )
3. You will not be kicked out of the church for hating jell-o, not playing the piano, not having blonde hair, not liking Jane Austen, not going to BYU, or not bawling your eyes out whenever you speak in church. You’re allowed to be different.
4. You have talents of your own. Use them. We need them, and we need you.
5. Most members are not jerks. If someone said or did something hurtful, don’t lick your wounds- tell them. They probably didn’t realize what they did, and will want the chance to make things right.
6. Some people, however, are jerks. Walk away. You don’t need them. (Mormons are humans. They’re not perfect and the church has not yet adopted a No-Jerks-Allowed policy, despite my letter writing campaign)
7. You can ask for help. It’s allowed. In fact, I encourage it.
7.5 Don’t be afraid to pop your hand in the air and ask questions if you have no idea what is going on or if someone said the most annoying phrase in all of Mormondom- “I’m sure you all know this…..” Stand up for yourself and your right to understand things.
8. Pray. A lot.
9. Don’t be ashamed of converting, and don’t be scared to share your faith. Amazing things can happen if you do. If people aren’t nice when you do, see #6
10. You won’t know everything. I’ve been at this for almost 5 years and I’m still learning. Most life-long members still are (if not, they’re probably super arrogant and again might warrant a review of #6). Try not to get discouraged. Learning is what makes this whole journey interesting.
11. Do your visiting/home teaching. Do your calling. You will learn so much, and be blessed for your service. It’s also a great way to find your place in the church.
12. Journal. My biggest regret is having not journaled more during this time. It will be a huge blessing to be able to look back on past experiences and remember why you are doing this, and how you have seen G-d’s hand in your life. It’s also cool to look back and see how far you’ve come.
13. (this one is important, so pay attention) It’s going to suck for a while. I don’t know any convert for whom the first year to year-and-a-half weren’t full of incredibly hard trials, feelings of isolation, and longing looks back. They say this is because Satan attacks. I think it’s also because G-d wants to make sure you appreciate and protect your testimony; if you have to work to keep it, it will mean so much more. But, it will get better. And, I promise, it is worth it, so please don’t give up.
14. You’re not alone. When things are hard, you can always turn to your savior, and to your Heavenly Father for comfort and guidance. Your bishop, visiting/home teachers, missionaries, and friends, are all resources for you. You can also reach out to me (Amenalready@yahoo.com) . I’ve been there. We converts have to stick together.
I just feel like she has some things right and she continues to look in the right perspective. So glad that out of humor I can find gems like these.
Well I wasn't expecting to go that way but it did. Anywhoooooo
This blogger wrote this post recently and while she addressed it to converts to the Church I feel that it most definitely applies to all of us on our journey of spiritual progression. She says:
This summer will mark 5 years since I first set foot in an LDS church and met with the missionaries (that’s a different story for a different time).
I’ve done a few posts about what it’s like to be a convert, so I apologize if I’m getting repetitive. But I never expected to have the platform I have now, so I want to use it for good. There’s so much I wish I had known back when I started investigating and then after I converted, and so much I needed to hear. I hope that by saying some of that here now, I can spare someone a little of the suckyness that comes from converting. And I don’t think it applies just to converts. So, here are some of the things I wish I had known as an investigator/new convert/member-whose- bishop-said-she-is-no-longer-a-“new-covert”-but-she-is-still-trying-to-find-her-way-and-kind-of-resents-Bishop-for-saying-that
1. You didn’t make a mistake.
2. Mormons have their own language (RM= returned missionary, RS= Relief Society, EQ= Elder’s Quorum, YM/YW=Young Men/Young Women’s, the U= University of Utah, the Y= BYU (or a hiking trail in Provo that I’m told is lovely), ZL= Zone Leader, FGSJSTWPBYDMI= For Goodness Sake, Just Say The Whole Phrase Because You’re Driving Me Insane (I made that last one up) )
3. You will not be kicked out of the church for hating jell-o, not playing the piano, not having blonde hair, not liking Jane Austen, not going to BYU, or not bawling your eyes out whenever you speak in church. You’re allowed to be different.
4. You have talents of your own. Use them. We need them, and we need you.
5. Most members are not jerks. If someone said or did something hurtful, don’t lick your wounds- tell them. They probably didn’t realize what they did, and will want the chance to make things right.
6. Some people, however, are jerks. Walk away. You don’t need them. (Mormons are humans. They’re not perfect and the church has not yet adopted a No-Jerks-Allowed policy, despite my letter writing campaign)
7. You can ask for help. It’s allowed. In fact, I encourage it.
7.5 Don’t be afraid to pop your hand in the air and ask questions if you have no idea what is going on or if someone said the most annoying phrase in all of Mormondom- “I’m sure you all know this…..” Stand up for yourself and your right to understand things.
8. Pray. A lot.
9. Don’t be ashamed of converting, and don’t be scared to share your faith. Amazing things can happen if you do. If people aren’t nice when you do, see #6
10. You won’t know everything. I’ve been at this for almost 5 years and I’m still learning. Most life-long members still are (if not, they’re probably super arrogant and again might warrant a review of #6). Try not to get discouraged. Learning is what makes this whole journey interesting.
11. Do your visiting/home teaching. Do your calling. You will learn so much, and be blessed for your service. It’s also a great way to find your place in the church.
12. Journal. My biggest regret is having not journaled more during this time. It will be a huge blessing to be able to look back on past experiences and remember why you are doing this, and how you have seen G-d’s hand in your life. It’s also cool to look back and see how far you’ve come.
13. (this one is important, so pay attention) It’s going to suck for a while. I don’t know any convert for whom the first year to year-and-a-half weren’t full of incredibly hard trials, feelings of isolation, and longing looks back. They say this is because Satan attacks. I think it’s also because G-d wants to make sure you appreciate and protect your testimony; if you have to work to keep it, it will mean so much more. But, it will get better. And, I promise, it is worth it, so please don’t give up.
14. You’re not alone. When things are hard, you can always turn to your savior, and to your Heavenly Father for comfort and guidance. Your bishop, visiting/home teachers, missionaries, and friends, are all resources for you. You can also reach out to me (Amenalready@yahoo.com) . I’ve been there. We converts have to stick together.
I just feel like she has some things right and she continues to look in the right perspective. So glad that out of humor I can find gems like these.
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